Big Boy Room

My big boys room is all finished up (well sans the window treatments but he is perfectly happy to live with towels pinned up there for now)

It looks great and our house is now officially a 4 bedroom (we bought it as a 3 bedroom). I love his room. Its funny to me because I never wanted a boy and here I had more fun with his room then I did with Izze's :-)

He loves it. And he's dying to get his Thomas stickers up and on the wall. I think thats going to be a mommy/Caden day project on one of our Mondays together.

Don't Blink

Scene: Morning of the second day of school; I am waking Caden up.
"Hey buddy, its time to go to GinaMary's for daycare"
"No Momma, I want to go to school, to preschool!"
"Sorry buddy, your not big enough yet"
"Yes mom. I is big now....see" {Stretches legs out in the air to show me}
Fast forward 30 minutes; dropping Izze off at school (after leaving a pouting Caden at daycare as he watched his friends go to preschool and he didn't--MOM GUILT)
"Bye Fa-shizza, have a good day"
"Bye mom, see you after school!" {looks around to see who's watching BEFORE she gives me a kiss}
So I walk to my car and climb in and turn the radio on.
The song "Don't Blink" is playing.
And here comes the tears....they flow.....and flow...... and flow.

Show off

He musta known I blogged about him this morning because just now this is what he surprised Izze and I with!!!!

"Momma momma, look at Caden he's KNEELING!"



"MOMMA MOMMA COME BACK HE'S STANDING"

They grow up soooo fast

My baby man is growing up. He has two teeth now. And he's working on some more.

He's turned into an OCTOPUS during diaper changes. His sister NEVER did this.

He is a CRAB butt when he's tired.
But he is no where near as anal about his routine as his dad thinks he is.

He is boy through and through. He finds every piece of furniture I don't want him to have; every small toy I told his sister to take downstairs-that she didn't; every vent and outlet that we forgot to cover.

But its all good, cause this little man can ROCK a mowawk like its noone's business--and thus wrap his momma around his teeny tiny-stuck in a vent-fingers!

Blur

Its a amazing how fast the days can go. I don't know how in the world I have a daughter that is almost 2 years old. I have no idea how it seems like yesterday I was planning a cruise, but now its so far past that trip that there are not even tan lines left to reminise about.

I walk through the halls of the high school and remember the feeling of being that age, and how I thought my fight with my boyfriend was the end of the world. I dont FEEL much different though I know I am. I havent looked in the mirror and noticed how different I look. But when I see them in the -45 degree windchills with thier flip flops on and mini skirts, and the faces of 12 year olds, I realize they are not 12, they are 18. 18 year olds did not start looking younger, but I have started to look older.

I hear of someone calling in "drunk" to a job, and wonder did I EVER think it was okay to do that. I know that an 8am class in college was something that about killed me and I rarely made it to. I know that working in the group home I'd often sweet talk a freind into covering my shift so I could go down town. I thought life was so difficult.

I pass through these stages of my life: highschool, college, marriage, babies; and I dont feel as though they were that long ago. And then I realize, it was not yesterday that I visited River Falls for the first time with Katie to visit her sister and saw a movie for 1.50. That happend 12 years ago. It was not yesterday that I got in a pushing match with Jaime on the basketball court while cheering over who was right and who was wrong, that was 9 years ago! Or my first apartment and getting independence only to want to crawl back home and hide forever when watching the twin towers go up in flames. Or moving in with Kevin and learning how to budget for two instead of one. Or finishing college and planning a wedding and student teaching and working and hardly having time to breath. Or seeing the positive on the pregnancy test. Or going to the hospital and coming home with a CHILD.

How is it that one moment, the hardest or the best, can all of a sudden feel like an eternity but t our entire lives seem to go by in the blink of an eye.

Baby steps....

Step 1: Bring potty in house. Izze sees potty, screams hits it, will not go near it.
Step 2: Desensitize potty. Leave it in living room, get used to being in the room with it!
Step 3: Play with potty, take it apart, put it together!
Step 4: Sit on potty. Scream more, revert back to step one!
Step 5: Reapeat one through 4.
Step 6: Finally, mom and dad get candy. Sit on potty for one second per piece of candy, eat so many candys you have a tummy ache.
Step 7: Mom and dad realize they break the candy into smaller pieces.
Step 8: After 7 nights of sitting the potty. Tinkle in potty!
Step 9: Watch mom and dad go CRAZY, cheering, dancing, clapping, giving you lots and lots of gummys!
Step 10: Dump and flush potty! Whew...thats hard....

Updates

Anal retentive won. I gave in, and organized Izze's BIG GIRL room. She will not be moving in there, but at least I have some toys outta my living room! She was seriously taking over. Its much nicer!

We are on pony tail strike in my home. She keeps RIPPING them out and pulling out her hair in the process. It would be easiest to skip them all together, but then her hair hangs in her face. I do not want bangs for her, adn therefor refuse to cut it. Its one big ugly circle.

In other news, she is no longer goliath. She is down from the 90th percentile to the 75th, in both weight and height. She is also done with shots until kindergarten, and done with well baby until her second birthday. Wow she grows so fast.

We are moving on to environmentally freindly diapers (Thanks Amber!) They are called gdiapers. They are disposable, flushable, compositable diapers (You can also use clothe with them if you so choose). I hope they work out for us. They are SUPER cute.

13 days until back to work and back to school....oh the joys and the tears. I am soo nervouse about school. Hopefully, I get my books mailed here in time.

We are off for our last "camping trip" of the year. We will be home Thursday!

My baby is WALKING!

Its official. She is a walker! 15 months to the day! So proud. Her daddy is outta town, so he missed it. But he will get to see her do it plenty when he gets home!

Oh the difference a year can make....

My little girl has grown so. We have been through soo much!

A very long waited arrival,
Our first night at home: being terriffied to shut my eyes or move to far away
Trying breastfeeding: the torment on wether it was or wasn't for us, 6 weeks, that went so fast
First camping trip: thank god for my family, life is much harder without "Dad" around
First shots: Dad being sadder then Izze was, Mom held it together ok
Dad going to Canada: Oh, did mom make him feel bad about that, but we survived the week!
First overnight away from mom and dad: Grandma of course.
Learning to roll, sit and crawl!
First cereal and first foods
Moving to her own room! What a big girl!
Learning to "self soothe" and put herself to sleep!
First words: Ma, Da, Og
First sentance: "Ooo Otty Oggs, ooo otty!"
Our first bought of the flu! Oh, boy, thats a lesson we could do without!
First ponytails! Oh sooo important and soooo cute!

The time has flown, and there is so much more to go......but here is a little "montoge" of Izze's first year!

Cha-cha-cha-chia

Sometimes the days go by so quickly I have no idea what month it is anymore. But then reality hits and I look at the calendar. I see that I only have 13 sleeps until I wake up and my baby is one! I can not even begin to fathom this thought. She is supposed to be an infant, my snuggily little cuddily infant. But no, this baby isn't such a baby anymore. She's a talking, crawling, growing little toddler. She sasses her momma, she chases her puppies, she works her daddy, she pulls tons over on her grandparents and most of all she GROWS. I knew this would happen, I knew she would change, and I'm glad she does so well at it. But I wasn't prepared for the speed. She's like my very own chia pet....sprouting off new buds all the time! So here I sit, mourning my last few days of being a mother of an 11 month old and in my heart I'm doing a little rejoicing in the marical that is her; crying over the time that has gone to fast; and wondering how I will protect this beautiful little creature while still allowing her the freedoms she so yearns to learn on her own. Oh momma----this is one tough job.

My heart....

Well....I've calmed down some. Maybe because I am not forking over as much moola as I thought I was, maybe because I was home sick today enjoying the silence, maybe because its a NEW day, or maybe because it is not 10 degrees below zero anymore! Either way, I'm a much happier person.

But I'm a sadder mommy. My Izze girl crawled. I cheered for her, I clapped for her, and I sobbed for her (or me). The smallest milestones to the biggest all mean one thing: my baby is growing up. I swore my blog wouldn't be about Izze, since she has her own place, but I must say how I feel about this.

I swear two minutes ago, I was turning 25, I took a test on a whim, and BAMM baby on the way. 20 seconds later I find out we will be having a girl, 40 seconds after that I am having my first major surgery, to which I find a baby who is very messy, has a very crooked nose, and managed to steal my heart anyways, from that moment in time, I can not breath without feeling fear that I won't be able to protect her, joy that she is mine, and sorrow that its all going so fast. On to minute two. 40 seconds ago she was going to day care, and I was sobbing that I had to leave her, 30 seconds ago she started eating REAL food, 20 seconds ago she was sleeping in her own room without me, and to the present she is crawling and getting into EVERYTHING.

I live my life wondering if the next moment will ever be here, every thing I watch her do takes on a life and time of its own. When I hear that sad sob and the call "mama", my heart breaks and I feel like I've been living that moment forever, and it will never end. When she giggles, the world smiles, the lights shine brighter, the stars twinkle faster, and my mind spins into bliss, it is the best 3 second laugh in the world. But in those moments, time stands still. So why, when those seconds past, and those minutes, days, weeks and months, do you feel like they went so fast? I don't know. I don't know if my heart will ever be strong enough to be a mom, but its being forced to. It is the most amazing title in the world, and if I'm never known as anything else....that will be okay with me.