Oh no....the temptation

Feeling good about.....

ME!

I'm no where near my goal. But I'm on my way. I've managed to lose enough weight in the last few weeks that I can finally SEE the difference! How much do you love it when your husband starts singing to your daughter "Mommys getting Sexy Back." I know he never thought it was gone but the fact that he noticed the small change makes it a much bigger change so yeah for a noticable difference.

Then there is the dreaded exercise. I hate it. But I'm doing it and they are right, the more you do it, the better you feel, so the more I do it! Love that! I went to water aerobics for the first time ever and it kicked my ass. The work out was fine but when I was laying in bed last night I turned into Gumby the rubber man. So my new goal, to do water aerobics until I'm the one kicking its ass!

And lastly the eating. Its a day at a time thing. I have a notebook where I write what I eat. I can't lie in there, and I am doing good. But noone else sees it. So I'm making a chart, like a kid who goes potty. I'm putting the big fat chart on the fridge and when I do good and make it a whole day without cheating I'm getting a sticker. And you bet your ass I'll work for my sticker, because thats just the kind of girl I am. Maybe I can have a competetion....I can see if I can get more stickers then my kid brother does for his potty chart. That sounds great......Cecile is taking on the 5 year old....Your going down kid!

So thats all for now....just haning out with a smile on my face and feeling good about me!

Peep

I'm sitting her thinking of all the things that need to be done. And thinking of any excuse I can not to do them. I could go put away the loads of laundry, but that is my least favorite job in the world. I could go do some scrapbooking but lately that feels more like work than relaxation. I could go find something to make for super and MAKE it, but that means thinking about food (which I'm doing my best to avoid). I could balance the check book but that makes me realize I'm poor. I could go read my book, but I know if I dare do that Izze will sense my relaxation and wake up and cry "MaMaMaMa". I could go work out, but then I wouldn't be avoiding. So instead, I'm sitting her by the computer doing my best not to make a peep and to not get ANYTHING done today. But thats okay because tomorrow is Thursday and its almost the weekend, and then instead of getting something done, I can make Kev do it:-) Ha ha ha.

My Goal

It helps to set a goal....so here is mine, and seeing it ON me makes it that much more attainable. To earn a cruise, I need to do it in a year.....
I can do it.


From this (after Izze)



To something more like this (before Izze):



Or better than that if I can....we will see!

I CAN do it!

Will Power

Some days you just have it, some days it goes missing. I've done very good for a while. But when I'm not being held accountable I let it slide. When I write down all of my activities and all the foods I eat and I know someone will look at that, I DO IT and I do well. I don't lie. When I am not writting it down, I lie to myself, if I eat skittles 10 times a day but only a handful at a time, it must not count. So, today I am starting to try harder with small steps and that means being accountable even if its only out here in cyber land. One day at a time.....Today I did 30 minutes of aerobics and I wrote down EVERYTHING I ate. No lies......one day down, the rest of my life to go.......

How much my blog is worth!

My blog is worth $564.54.
How much is your blog worth?

My heart....

Well....I've calmed down some. Maybe because I am not forking over as much moola as I thought I was, maybe because I was home sick today enjoying the silence, maybe because its a NEW day, or maybe because it is not 10 degrees below zero anymore! Either way, I'm a much happier person.

But I'm a sadder mommy. My Izze girl crawled. I cheered for her, I clapped for her, and I sobbed for her (or me). The smallest milestones to the biggest all mean one thing: my baby is growing up. I swore my blog wouldn't be about Izze, since she has her own place, but I must say how I feel about this.

I swear two minutes ago, I was turning 25, I took a test on a whim, and BAMM baby on the way. 20 seconds later I find out we will be having a girl, 40 seconds after that I am having my first major surgery, to which I find a baby who is very messy, has a very crooked nose, and managed to steal my heart anyways, from that moment in time, I can not breath without feeling fear that I won't be able to protect her, joy that she is mine, and sorrow that its all going so fast. On to minute two. 40 seconds ago she was going to day care, and I was sobbing that I had to leave her, 30 seconds ago she started eating REAL food, 20 seconds ago she was sleeping in her own room without me, and to the present she is crawling and getting into EVERYTHING.

I live my life wondering if the next moment will ever be here, every thing I watch her do takes on a life and time of its own. When I hear that sad sob and the call "mama", my heart breaks and I feel like I've been living that moment forever, and it will never end. When she giggles, the world smiles, the lights shine brighter, the stars twinkle faster, and my mind spins into bliss, it is the best 3 second laugh in the world. But in those moments, time stands still. So why, when those seconds past, and those minutes, days, weeks and months, do you feel like they went so fast? I don't know. I don't know if my heart will ever be strong enough to be a mom, but its being forced to. It is the most amazing title in the world, and if I'm never known as anything else....that will be okay with me.

Warning....political statement

Warning: This is my view, you do not have to agree, if your reading this, you are accepting my freedom of speech.....

Why does the world work this way. Scratch that, why does OUR free nation work this way? I mean seriously. Our country is set up for the poor or the rich, and noone in between. I'm going through doing my taxes and I have to fork over the government what I consider to be BIG money. I can barely pay my bills as it is and now they are taking over a months rent from me! Seriously, no offense intended, because I know some people who NEED welfare, and thats all well and good for them but there are those that ABUSE the system. People who could have a better job and choose not to because then they wouldnt have free insurance for thier children through the state, these same people manage to not have to pay any taxes and get a huge refund because they have children and are under the tax break mark, they get child care credits, and credits for going to school to get a degree (which they refuse to use), they live off of the money I and millions of other Americans fork over. Money we could use for our own families. What kind of country is this, where I have to help others when I can't even help myself. Don't get me wrong, I'd be the first to give to a charity when I am able, to help feed the homeless, and to help victims of a hurricain. Since I can't do that all the time, I help in other ways, I babysit for free for someone who can't afford child care, I help out friends who are in dire need, even though I myself am in need. Its hard to be forced to give money to a government run by people I don't even BELIEVE in, that just angers me. These people make sure the rich get richer, they use my money to fight a war that I don't support, to send more troops to a place they no longer belong. They use my money to make laws that hurt our children (No Child Left Behind---my ass!). But not to take care of Americans with things like Health Care or Education. And yet come April 15th, I have to write out that check and send it to them. The federal government will let Bush spend it in some obsene way and the state will use it to help people abuse our generousity. What a life we live.

Naughty or Nice?

Your Christmas Song Is

I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus Then I saw mommy tickle santa claus Underneath his beard so snowy white Oh, what a laugh it would have been If daddy had only seen Mommy kissing santa claus last night At Christmas, you feel like a kid again Complete with major Christmas eve insomnia

What Christmas Carol Are You?

I'm a PIPER!

You Are a Boston Terrier Puppy

Aggressive, wild, and rambunctious. Deep down, you're just a cuddle monster.

What Breed of Puppy Are You?

Who IS my daddy?

Your Daddy Is Dennis Rodman

What You Call Him: Pa Why You Love Him: He takes you to church

Who's Your Daddy?

Happy New Year to You!

Happy New Year to Us All!

I hate making resolutions because I never keep them. I find it unrealistic to put that pressure and decision based upon one day! So none for me this year. Kevin and I did however decide to make healthier life choices and get some of our baby weight off. Yes I meant OUR. I am back at Weight Watchers and its worked for me before so I am hopeful. For my ten percent goal Kev has offered to buy me some new clothes when I reach it, and for my "lifetime goal" I'm working for a CRUISE! Yeah! It seems like forever since our last one. So if I make my goal, we are going on a cruise in 2008. So sorry 2007, what a great greeting to you, but I want you outta here!

My baby will be one this year. Thats just amazing. It seems like yesterday it was 2005, and we were looking at a pregnancy test to see if I was losing it or if there really were two lines! And now she is already such a big girl! Oh the changes a year makes!

I'm so grateful for this past year, and I'm looking forward to a new one! Much love to you all!